Dear wonderful soul,
Realising we are not our emotions is an important lesson in life + it’s one we often end up learning + re-learning, again + again.
Here’s how it usually goes. Something happens + we experience a pang of emotion. We never mind when it’s positive, so when we are on an up it feels great. But when the emotion is negative we often find it hard to process + sit with. We look for ways to get away from it, change it or push ourselves towards another emotion as fast as we can.
The hardest thing to do is often the right thing to do.
Sitting with the emotion + allowing ourselves to exist in the context of it can be really hard. We struggle with doing nothing. We struggle with this feeling – the experience of having the feeling + the desperate need + desire to make it go away.
If we sit with our emotion + just deepen our breath – amazing things can happen.
I recently had an experience of intense anger.
It’s not often I experience that emotion so it was overwhelming. I felt the urge to fight it + to run from it. Every part of my body wanted to somehow run away from it + make it go away.
I realised I needed to sit with it. I closed my eyes + lay still. It was so hard.
I sat with the emotion + with my breath.
At first all I was doing was breathing anger. Then gradually + subtly my breath started to change my emotion. A part of me made the option available that perhaps it wasn’t such a big deal. Perhaps I didn’t need to be so angry.
I sat with the breath in this anger + feeling of perhaps. Then the perhaps became: I don’t need to be so angry anymore. + I sat with the knowledge that although I wasn’t ready yet, I didn’t need to be so angry anymore.
Finally, as I sat with the breath, I let go of my anger. I returned to a neutral state of emotion. Everything was ok. I was ok. I was done being angry.
I could have done the opposite. I could have moved to change, fix or adjust the feeling. I could have reacted to my anger + perhaps done something I didn’t entirely want to do. It’s amazing how attached we can get to our emotions, when they can be so fleeting. The intensity can confuse us into thinking it’s a permanent state of affairs.
Next time you experience intense emotion you feel the urge to react to, just sit. Breathe. Breathe even though you don’t feel like it. Keep breathing long + deep + just observe what’s going on inside you. Allow yourself to let go of your attachment to your emotion.
Big love to you + your beautiful hearts,
Raeeka
xo
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